Romance in Nigeria is on Life Support: How Financial Worries Are Stealing Our Hearts

 

The State of Romance in Nigeria: Survival Mode Takes Over

In the heart of Nigeria today, romance seems to be on the brink of extinction, overtaken by the overwhelming worry about finances. A deepening financial crisis has left the nation caught in a cycle of survival mode, where concerns about money dominate every conversation, overshadowing the very essence of human connection. It’s no longer just about love, affection, or genuine companionship. Instead, every meeting, every interaction, seems to revolve around the question: What can I get out of this financially?

Nigeria's economic difficulties have reached a point where even the most intimate relationships are now seen through the lens of survival. The constant pressure to make ends meet has clouded people's ability to engage in romantic gestures, and love has been relegated to the background. In conversations and relationships, the primary focus has shifted from emotions to how one can secure financial stability — even at the expense of personal connections.

The Overbearing Influence of Financial Struggles

For many Nigerians today, money is no longer just a means of survival; it has become the most important currency in every aspect of life. Whether it's in friendships, romantic relationships, or casual acquaintanceships, financial concerns dominate. People are more inclined to ask about how to access funds or resources than to talk about feelings or desires. Even the simplest acts of kindness or affection now carry a heavy price tag. Conversations that would have been filled with laughter, warmth, and flirtation are now often consumed by discussions of loans, cash, and ways to hustle for money.

Take, for example, the story of Chidi, a young man living in Lagos. When he first met Ada, a woman he was genuinely interested in, their conversations were filled with shared dreams, laughter, and ideas about the future. But as time passed, the discussion began to shift toward more practical matters. Ada would ask him for financial help, claiming that her business was struggling or that her family needed support. At first, Chidi was happy to assist, thinking it was an opportunity to show care and build a connection. However, soon, their conversations turned transactional. Every time they spoke, Ada seemed to have a new financial request. Before long, the relationship felt more like a business transaction than a romantic partnership.

Similarly, a friend of mine, Nkechi, who works in Abuja, recently shared her experience of dating in the current climate. She mentioned how, after a few dates with a seemingly charming man, the conversation shifted from discussing their shared love for music and travel to him asking her for money to settle a debt. This shift, she explained, made her feel like her worth was reduced to her ability to provide financial support. “Romance is no longer about feeling special or cherished. It’s about who can give more,” Nkechi lamented.

The Shift from Love to Survival Mode

As Nigeria’s economy continues to struggle, more people find themselves on a constant quest for financial security. The increasing unemployment rate, the soaring cost of living, and the economic uncertainty are making it difficult for individuals to enjoy the simple pleasures of life, including love and companionship. Instead, individuals are focusing all their energy on figuring out how to make money — and in doing so, romantic pursuits take a backseat.

Romance, traditionally thought to be about shared intimacy, trust, and affection, now feels more like a luxury that few can afford. It’s almost as if love has been drained out of daily life, replaced by an overwhelming focus on survival. In a country where the future is uncertain, many are finding it hard to prioritize the intangible emotions that make romantic relationships thrive.

A Call for Change

However, this trend doesn't have to be irreversible. While money plays a significant role in everyone’s life, it shouldn’t define relationships or dictate the depth of human connection. Nigerians must remember that amidst the struggles of survival, there is still room for love, compassion, and emotional support. Perhaps it’s time to redefine what romance truly means — to look beyond the material needs and focus on building genuine, heartfelt connections that can weather the storms of life.

Love may have taken a backseat to financial concerns in Nigeria today, but with the right mindset, it is possible to rekindle the flame of romance, one small gesture at a time. The challenge is learning how to balance survival with the human need for affection, care, and companionship. As the country continues to navigate its economic struggles, the question remains: Can we find a way to nurture love alongside the fight for financial stability?

In the end, perhaps the most important thing we can do is simply to remind ourselves and others that, even in times of hardship, romance can still have a place in our lives.